FMG: Summertime TV is at its peak

all summer-themed everything!!

Picture this: It’s a Wednesday evening in July, and you’re trying to stave off the heat wave with a little happy hour in Chicago’s West Loop neighborhood. There’s a (truly stunning) blonde woman waiting to cross Randolph at Halsted. What’s that she’s doing? Oh, she’s attempting to discreetly remove her sticky bra from under her shirt (a sticky bra that grew unsticky thanks to the aforementioned heat wave and an Uber driver’s questionable choice to leave the AC off). What a cool, chill girl! Oh look, she’s dropped the sticky bra on the ground. She’s accidentally kicking it with her feet across Randolph, and now she’s bending down to pick it up while also crossing the street and attempting not to flash anyone. She’s hoping no one’s noticing the scene she’s making on her way to dinner at La Josie with her siblings, but she has no such luck.

Now that we’ve all pictured that scenario and sat with it for a moment, let’s move right along.

Happy Friday!

• TV: My two favorite summertime shows, The Summer I Turned Pretty and Bachelor in Paradise, are both back. (No, Summer House does not count as a summertime show because it films in the summer but airs in the winter and spring. Get it together!)

  • I really wish that the full new season of The Summer I Turned Pretty came out all at once, but that’s honestly the only critique I’ll be accepting. I keep seeing people say that they think it’s too cheesy/cringey, which leads me to wonder if they’re just starting the show now, or if they perhaps simply weren’t previously paying attention. The show has always been cheesy, its dialogue has always been a little off, and those facts only add to the show’s allure. It’s a show about rich teenagers falling in love in a beach town, and it’s perfect. Take your bad opinions elsewhere.

  • Speaking of perfect television, let’s give Bachelor in Paradise the flowers it deserves. Much like myself at mile 19 of the 2022 Chicago Marathon, it simply needed a break to freak out, find itself, and then come back stronger than ever. I will never tire of watching hot people talk about their feelings on a daybed, and I genuinely wish there was a 24/7 live-stream of Paradise vs. a mere two-hour window each Monday.

    Rapid-fire opinions:

    • Kat was not in the wrong for asking Dale for some transparency, and his reaction says way more about him than about her. Kat, you should dead it and get with Jonathon instead!

    • Justin cared more about doing ~the right thing~ than about finding love, which does indeed point to him not being ready to move on from Susie but also doesn’t mean he deserved Lexi’s online tour de hate. Intent and impact both matter!

    • Hannah B. is the most overrated member of Bachelor Nation, and there’s no reason for her to be on my screen.

    • Jess looks so much like my friend Josie (and Jess and Spencer are almost as cute as Josie and her fiancé Joey), and I’m currently rooting for Jess and Spencer to win the $500k.

    • The Goldens are sweet and fun and I love them all. No notes!

• Books: I went through a brief period (essentially the past month) where I only read books that had the word “summer” in the title (it was partially purposeful, partially not). Below, I’m sharing the three books I read that fit that criteria, in descending order of enjoyment.

  • Til Summer Do Us Part by Meghan Quinn: This was simply the weirdest concept ever? Basically, a woman’s boss asks if she’s married, she inexplicably lies and says yes, and then the boss invites her and her fictional husband to a marriage camp hosted by her husband and attended by all their coworkers (so naturally she has to ask her best friend’s brother, who she’s weirdly never met despite both of them being hot and single and very close to the best friend, to pretend to be her husband at the marriage camp?????). I love the fake dating trope, and I love anything that takes place at a camp, but the male lead had a lip ring and wore a beanie all summer (“homeboy wore combat boots to the beach” vibes), and that pretty much ruined the entire book for me.

  • Just for the Summer by Abby Jimenez: Two people meet on Reddit after discovering that they share a similar affliction: Everyone they date ends up meeting their forever person right after they break up. They decide to date each other for a few weeks to hopefully break each other’s curses, all while also navigating some heavy stuff in their respective personal lives. It was a more fun + slightly more realistic concept than Til Summer Do Us Part, and I liked both main characters a lot, but it got a little bit long in the end.

  • One Golden Summer by Carley Fortune: Omg!! I’m obsessed! I genuinely wish I could read this one for the first time again, if only to meet my beloved Charlie and the very endearing Alice a second time. It was somehow the perfect blend of cheesy and realistic, and I genuinely wouldn’t change a thing. You’ll fly through it and you’ll love it!

I hope you find some joy and some sunshine this weekend. The world is dark but you are light!!!! Go share it!!!!

XOXO,

Gail*

*A man on Hinge opened a convo this week with “Hey, Gail!” I’m choosing to believe he’s a fan and that my fame precedes me. Cheers!

---